15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy

During Year end, I got lovely post from my mentor. I also firmly believe that if not all, we can give up at least some of the below mentioned things, and surely it'll work good for us.

Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:

1. Give up your need to always be right. 

There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?”Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?

2. Give up your need for control.

Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu

3. Give up on blame. 

Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk.

Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle

5. Give up your limiting beliefs about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle

6. Give up complaining.

Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, many things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. Give up the luxury of criticism.

 Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. Give up your need to impress others.

Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take of all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. Give up your resistance to change.

Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell

10. Give up labels.

Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer

11. Give up on your fears.

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.
“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. Give up your excuses.

 Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. Give up the past.

 I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

14. Give up attachment.

This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another,  attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.

15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations.

 Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need…and eventually they forget about themselves.  You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

Blind can see what we can't

Below attached information is true inspiring story, happened with my mentor's friend, who is working in Singapore. I'm sure you will like it.

"I am sharing this wonderful experience a friend of mine recently had in Singapore.

I was invited to one Friday evening event by one of MNC Vendor organization who had organized the event to raise funds for the visually handicapped people in a center for blind people.

Since it was a Friday evening, I first thought to skip the event considering it could be a bit boring and rather spend the evening relaxing by some other means.

But being alone and sometimes finding it difficult to kill time, I thought of accepting the invitation and registered online for booking. Moreover it was free :) which was another motivation to go to the event. I was looking at the event as a means to pass some time, meet few people and nothing else.

When I went there, there were approx 40 people from various industries invited for that event. I found some Indians and naturally talked to them about how life is in Singapore etc etc. Initially we were shown a video about the visually handicapped center. What are their activities, how are they helping blind people in Singapore to lead a more fulfilling life, etc . It was a short 15 minute video and quite inspiring; how people from different walks of life spend time in helping these blind people without expecting anything in return. They shared the satisfaction and fulfillment they get by helping them.

After the video, we all were gathered in a hall and were briefed about the next event. The theme of the next event was "Dining in the Dark". And this was the event which turned out to be so inspiring and worth sharing.

What it meant was that all 40+ people present were going to have Dinner in a pitch dark room !!!! The next 2 hours were completely planned, organized, directed and executed by three blind youths. One was a girl ( Leader ) and the other two were boys, assistantig her, thus forming a team of three blind volunteers.

The blind leader first gave us tips for dining ( These were ACTUAL STANDARDS THE BLIND PEOPLE FOLLOW IN ORDER TO MAKE
THERE LIFE EASIER )

 1, When you sit at your table the things will be placed as follows :
   at 3 o clock of your dish : You will find a spoon.
   at 9 o clock : Fork;     12 o clock : spoon.      2 o clock : Empty Glass
   Dish at the center with Paper napkin tucked at 6 o clock.

2. There will be two large Jugs circulated to you. The Jug with plain walls will have water and the Jug with curved wall will have orange juice.

3. When you get your Jug based on your choice you have to pour it in your glass. You have to dip your forefinger in the glass so that when you fill it and the liquid touches your finger, you stop pouring.

She asked whether everyone had understood . All said yes but everyone was confused and trying to remember what she had said and confirming from each other. The next 1 1/2 hours we spent were full of fun and learning. In a completely pitch dark room where we could not see ANYTHING, we were enjoying varieties of delicious food without seeing it.

All 40 of us were taken in groups in the dark hall . Each one was directed by a blind person and was seated into their respective chairs.  ( We were finding it awkward because actually we are supposed to guide blind people to their destination and help them )

We were served a full five course dinner by this team of three blind people- welcome drinks, appetizers, starters , main course and desserts. The amazing thing was that the team of three blind people were serving vegetarian dishes to vegetarian people who were sitting randomly in the room !!!

While registering online we were asked to declare whether we were "Vegetarian" or "Non vegetarian".  Being one, I chose the former.  We were so nicely hosted that we did not have to wait in between serves . As we wud be finishing one dish, we were served with the next without any delays.

After approx 1 and half hours of dining in the dark, the leader asked whether everyone had finished eating. After confirmation from us, she switched on the lights of the dining room. We left the Dining Room with tears in our eyes.

We realized how lucky we are and how we have been gifted with perfect vision to see the beautiful world. We realized how difficult lives of blind people are ( and other handicapped) without being able to see. We realized how uncomfortable we were for just two hours without being able to see anything and how they must be living their entire lives in this condition!  We realized how unfortunate we are, that we do not value such simple things in life we have and crib, sometimes overtly and sometimes quietly, and run after what we claim we don't have, and ignore the blessings we are blessed with!

 Be cheerful. Value whatever you have in life.  There's no harm in striving harder for more, but don't make it the basis of your existence, don't make it a rule that you MUST have more!  You'll never have the time or the inclination even, to enjoy what you already have, if you do!

You need to experience it , something like I had experienced , to believe this philosophy of life."

The substance of life..…

Good message came from Nigerian Circle on holy name:

 

Death has to happen to everyone, in one way or other, inevitably and eventually. What is really important till then? During the time of life is when we actually can do something. What values did we leave behind for the world? What example did we gift to our children and to the world around us? What did we actually do to develop and show our love for God and for humanity and all other beings? That is all that really matters, because whatever money we make, whatever fame and power we acquire, whatever political successes we may have, it is all like the waves, ripples and foam on the surface of the Ganges. It is all coming and going; none of it has much substance. But to awaken to the eternal truth, that is the greatest success of life.

Real Mary Christmas

Below attached are few moments / stories / memories in the Jesus Christ life, which can give you whole idea. 

Real Event in my life: Day before yesterday I was pleased with the scene I'd seen on road, when I was waiting for my friend to pick me up for meeting in his car. One public Bus came with full loaded people into it and it was traffic time. One old person, he was unable to walk properly so his relative or some one helped him by literally lifted him to get into bus. He was so weak that after getting into bus from front door, he was unable to step up two steps and then to move further. Bus driver waited for him for long, then he requested one person to get up so that this old man can sit there and he can drive smoothly in traffic hours. When that person sit and made comfortable there after bus driver started his bus. Person who lifted him shown thumps UP to him. Looking into this scenario even I could not resist and shown BIG THUMPS UP to driver for his brilliant job. I was really touched. It's not a story which come in Internet or what's up or social media. It's live scene in front of me. Which means in traffic time, with so many boarded in the bus, none of the people made any noise (they also acted like Jesus follower) and Bus driver was too good. I would still say, because of people like this world is still surviving. And trust me I would say that this is real Christmas celebrations and not by throwing big party's in the pub with celebrities. I'm sure you all with agree.

 

Navratri - visit 4 Adishakti Pitha or 51 Shkati Pitha (Godess Parvati) or 18 Mahashakti Pitha

Below list may help you to check where are Maa Parvati (Durga / Amba)'s Shakti Pitha, So during Navaratri You can visit there and take blessings.

Four Adishakti Pitha:

Sr. No.	Place	Body Part or Ornament
1	In Puri, Odisha (inside Jagannath Temple complex)	Pada Bimala
2	BerhampurOdisha, Odisha	Sthana(Breasts) Tara Tarini
3	Guwahati-Assam	Yoni khanda Kamakshya
4	In Kalighat, Kolkata- West Bengal	Mukha khanda Dakshina Kalika

Sr. No.	Place	State in India/Country	Body Part or Ornament	Shakti	Bhairava
1	Amarnath, from Srinagar through Pahalgam 94 km by Bus, Chandanwari 16 km by walk	Jammu and Kashmir	Throat	Mahamaya	Trisandhyeshwar
2	Ambaji, at Anart	Gujarat	Heart	Ambaji	Batuk Bhairav
3	Arbuda Devi, at Mount Abu	Rajasthan	Adhar	Arbuda Devi or Adhar Devi	Bhairav
4	Attahas village of Dakshindihi in the district of Bardhaman, near the Katwa railway station	West Bengal	Lips	Phullara	Vishvesh
5	Bahuchara Mata, at Becharaji	Gujarat	Left hand	Bahuchara Mata	Kal Bhairav
6	Bahula, on the banks of Ajay river at Ketugram, 8 km from Katwa, Burdwan	West Bengal	Left arm	Goddess Bahula	Bhiruk
7	Bakreshwar, on the banks of Paaphara river, 24 km distance from Siuri Town, district Birbhum, 7 km from Dubrajpur Rly. Station	West Bengal	Portion between the eyebrows	Mahishmardini	Vakranath
9	Bhairavparvat, at Bhairav hills on the banks of Shipra river a little distance from Ujjaini town	Madhya Pradesh	Upper lips	Avanti	Lambkarna
10	Bhabanipur union, at Karatoyatat, 28 km distance from interior Sherpur upazila, Bogra District	Bangladesh	Left anklet (ornament)	Arpana	Vaman
11	Chandika Sthan or chandisthan, at Munger temple on the banks of Ganges near Ganga Darshan	Bihar	Left eye	Chandika or Chandi devi	Bholeshankar
12	Chintpurni or Chhinnamastika, in Una district, Himachal Pradesh, 20 km from the Amb Andaura railway station, 150 km from Chandigarh.	Himachal Pradesh	Feet	Chhinnamastika Devi	Rudra Mahadev
13	Danestwari (Kuldevi Of Bastar state ), Dantewada 80 km from Jagdalpur Tehsil	Chhattisgarh	Daant (teeth)	Danteshwari	Kapalbhairv
14	Gandaki, Pokhara about 125 km on the banks of Gandaki river where Muktinath temple is situated	Nepal	Temple	Gandaki Chandi	Chakrapani
15	Goddess Saptashrungi (Goddess with 18 arms), at Vani in Nasik	Maharashtra	Chin (2 parts)	Bhramari	Vikritaksh
16	Hinglaj (Or Hingula), southern Baluchistan a few hours North-east of Gawadar and about 125 km towards North-west from Karachi	Pakistan	Bramharandhra (Part of the head)	Kottari	Bhimlochan
17	Jayanti at Nartiang village in the Jaintia Hills district. This Shakti Peetha is locally known as the Nartiang Durga Temple.	Meghalaya	Left thigh	Jayanti	Kramadishwar
18	Jessoreswari, situated at Ishwaripur, Shyamnagar, district Satkhira. The temple complex was built by Maharaja Pratapaditya, whose capital was Ishwaripur.	Bangladesh	Palms of hands and soles of the feet	Jashoreshwari	Chanda
19	Jwalaji, Kangra from Pathankot alight at Jwalamukhi Road Station from there 20 km	Himachal Pradesh	Tongue	Siddhida (Ambika)	Unmatta Bhairav
20	Kalipeeth, (Kalighat, Kolkata)	West Bengal	Right Toes	Kalika	Nakuleshwar
21	Kalmadhav on the banks of Shon river in a cave over hills near to Amarkantak	Madhya Pradesh	Left buttock	Kali	Asitang
21	Kamgiri, Kamakhya, in the Neelachal hills near Guwahati	Assam	Genitals	Kamakhya	Umanand
23	Kanchipuram, Kamakshi temple, Kamakoti Peetam mentioned in Lalita Sahasram, Trishati, Astothram etc.	Tamil Nadu	Ottiyana (Ornament covering stomach)	Kamakshi	Kaal Bhairav
24	Kankalitala, on the banks of Kopai River 10 km north-east of Bolpur station in Birbhum district, Devi locally known as Kankaleshwari	West Bengal	Bone	Devgarbha	Ruru
25	Kanyashram of Balaambika - The Bhagavathy temple in Kanyakumari, the southernmost tip of mainland India, Tamil Nadu (also thought to be situated in Chittagong, Bangladesh)	Tamil Nadu	Back	Sarvani	Nimish
26	Karnat, Kangra	Himachal Pradesh	Both ears	Jayadurga	Abhiru
27	Kireet at Kireetkona village, 3 km from Lalbag Court Road station under district Murshidabad	West Bengal	Crown	Vimla	Sanwart
28	Locally known as Anandamayee Temple. Ratnavali, on the banks of Ratnakar river at Khanakul-Krishnanagar, district Hooghly	West Bengal	Right Shoulder	Kumari	Shiva
29	Locally known as Bhramari Devi. In Jalpaiguri near a small village Boda on the bank of river Teesta or Tri-shrota (combination of three flows) mentioned in Puranas	West Bengal	Left leg	Bhraamari	Ambar
30	Manas, under Tibet at the foot of Mount Kailash in Lake Mansarovar, a piece of Stone	Tibet	Right hand	Dakshayani	Amar
31	Manibandh, at Gayatri hills near Pushkar 11 km north-west of Ajmer	Rajasthan	Two Bracelets	Gayatri	Sarvanand
32	Mithila, near Janakpur railway station on the border of India and Nepal	Nepal	Left shoulder	Uma	Mahodar
33	Nainativu (Manipallavam), Northern Province, Sri Lanka. Located 36 km from the ancient capital of the Jaffna kingdom, Nallur. The murti of the Goddess is believed to have been consecrated and worshipped by Lord Indra. The protagonist, Lord Rama and antagonist, Ravana of the Sanskrit epic Ramayana have offered obeisances to the Goddess. Nāga and Garuda of the Sanskrit epic Mahabharata; resolved their longstanding feuds after worshipping this Goddess.	Sri Lanka	Silambu (Anklets)	Indrakshi (Nagapooshani / Bhuvaneswari)	Rakshaseshwar (Nayanair)
34	Nalhati, known as Nalateshwari Temple near Nalhati station of Birbhum district	West Bengal	Vocal chord with part of the tracheae	Kalika Devi	Yogesh
35	Nepal, near Pashupatinath Temple at Guhyeshwari Temple	Nepal	Groin	Guhyeshwari Devi	Kapali
36	On Chandranath hill near Sitakunda station of Chittagong District, Bangladesh. The famous Chandranath Temple on the top of the hill is the Bhairav temple of this Shakti Peetha, not the Shakti Peeth itself.	Bangladesh	Right arm	Bhawani	Chandrashekhar
37	Padmavati Devi (Padmavatipuri Dham), Panns 80 km from Satna	Madhya Pradesh	Padm	Padmavati Devi	Kapalbhairav
38	Panchsagar exact location not known (thought to be near Haridwar)	Uttarakhand	Lower teeth	Varahi	Maharudra
39	Patan Devi, at PATNA	Bihar	left shoulder with cloths	Badi Patan Devi/chhoti Patan Devi	Bhairav
40	Prabhas, 4 km from Veraval station near Somnath temple in Junagadh district	Gujarat	Stomach	Chandrabhaga	Vakratund
41	Prayag near Sangam at Allahabad	Uttar Pradesh	Finger	Alopi Devi Mandir or Madhaveswari	Bhava
42	Present day Kurukshetra town or Thanesar ancient Sthaneshwar	Haryana	Ankle bone	Savitri/BhadraKali	Sthanu
43	Ramgiri, at Chitrakuta on the Jhansi Manikpur railway line	Uttar Pradesh	Right breast	Shivani	Chanda
44	Sainthia, locally Known as Nandikeshwari temple. Only 1.5 km from the railway station under a banyan tree within a boundary wall, Birbhum district	West Bengal	Necklace	Nandini	Nandikeshwar
45	Sarvashail or Godavaritir, at Kotilingeswar temple on the banks of Godavari river near Rajamundry	Andhra Pradesh	Cheeks	Rakini or Vishweshwari	Vatsnabh or Dandpani
46	Shivaharkaray, a little distance from Sukkur Station from Karachi	Pakistan	Eyes	Mahishmardini	Krodhish
47	Shondesh, at the source point of Narmada River in Amarkantak	Madhya Pradesh	Right buttock	Narmada	Bhadrasen
48	Shri Parvat, near Ladak, Jammu and Kashmir. Another belief: at Srisailam in Shriparvat hills under Kurnool district	Andhra Pradesh	Right anklet (ornament)	Shrisundari	Sundaranand
49	Shri Shail, at Joinpur village, Dakshin Surma, near Gotatikar, 3 km north-east of Sylhet town	Bangladesh	Neck	Mahalaxmi	Sambaranand
50	Shuchi, in a Shiva temple at Suchindrum 11 km on Kanyakumari Trivandrum road	Tamil Nadu	Upper teeth	Narayani	Sanhar
51	Sugandha, situated in Shikarpur, Gournadi, about 20 km from Barisal town, Bangladesh, on the banks of Sonda river.	Bangladesh	Nose	Sugandha	Trayambak
52	Udaipur, Tripura, at the top of the hills known as Tripura Sundari temple near Radhakishorepur village, a little distance away from Udaipur town	Tripura	Right leg	Tripura Sundari	Tripuresh
53	Ujaani, 16 km from Guskara station under Burdwan district	West Bengal	Right wrist	Mangal Chandika	Kapilambar
54	Vajreshwari Temple, Kangra 18 km from Dharamshala Tehsil, Kangra	Himachal Pradesh	left Breast	Vajreshwari	Kalbhairv
55	Varanasi at Manikarnika Ghat on banks of the Ganges at Kashi	Uttar Pradesh	Earring	Vishalakshi & Manikarni	Kalbhairav
56	Vibhash, at Tamluk under district Purba Medinipur	West Bengal	Left ankle	Kapalini (Bhimarupa)	Sarvanand
57	Virat, near Bharatpur	Rajasthan	Left toes	Ambika	Amriteshwar
58	Vrindavan, near new bus stand on Bhuteshwar road within Bhuteshwar Mahadev Temple,Katyayanipeeth. Vrindavan	Uttar Pradesh	Ringlets of hair	Uma	Bhutesh
59	Dantakali at Dharan	Nepal	Teeth	Dantakali Devi	Bhairav
60	Chandi mandir at Memari Rly stn under Burdwan district	West Bengal	Intestines (Small)	Maa Chandi	Shiva
61	Sirkhanda,44 km from mussoorie and 25 km from new tehri by bus. district tehri garhawal near chamba [town area committee] Uttarakhand	body part- head part
62	surkanda mandir at new tehri under tehri garhawal district	uttarakhand	head (head part)	ma surkanda	kal bhairav

63 Tarapith Birbhum distric west bengal body part-3rd eye name of devi - ugra tara maa bhairav- chandrachur

18 mahashakti Pitha are given below:

Sr. No.	Place	Part of the body fallen	Name of Shakti
1	Trincomalee (Sri Lanka)	Groin	Shankari devi
2	Kanchi (Tamil Nadu)	Back part	Kamakshi Devi
3	Pandua (West Bengal)	Stomach	Srigala Devi
4	Mysore (Karnataka)	Hair	Chamundeshwari devi
5	Alampur (Andhra Pradesh)	Upper teeth	Jogulamba devi (Yogamba devi)
6	Shrishailam, (Andhra Pradesh)	Neck part	Bhramaramba devi
7	Kolhapur (Maharastra)	Eyes	Mahalakshmi devi
8	Mahur (Nanded District, Maharastra)	Right hand	Ekaveerika Devi
9	Ujjain (Madhya Pradesh)	Upper lip	Mahakali devi
10	Pithapuram (Andhra Pradesh)	Left hand	Puruhutika devi
11	Jajpur (Odisha)	Navel	Biraja Devi
12	Draksharamam (Andhra Pradesh)	Left cheek	Manikyamba devi
13	Guwahati (Assam)	Vulva	Kamarupa devi
14	Prayaga (Uttar Pradesh)	Fingers	Madhaveswari devi
15	Kangra,Jwalamukhi (Himachal Pradesh)	Tongue	Vaishnavi devi
16	Gaya (Bihar)	Breast part	Sarvamangala devi
17	Varanasi (Uttar Pradesh)	Wrist	Vishalakshi devi
18	Sharada Peeth(Kashmir) *	Right hand	Saraswathi devi